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KMA Tabloids: Santa Claus outraged by 'ho ho ho' ban 
Society
ColonelMustang writes:  

By: Janet Fyfe-Yeomans and Amanda Grant
November 15, 2007 07:00am

HE  is an unlikely revolutionary but this Christmas, Santa is a rebel with a claus. He is having the last laugh on political correctness - and it's a great big fat belly laugh.  Santas across Sydney are rebelling against attempts to ban their traditional greeting of "ho, ho, ho" in favour of "ha, ha, ha".  Recruitment firm Westaff - which supplies hundreds of Santas across the country - has told its trainees that the "ho ho ho" phrase could frighten children and could even be derogatory to women.  Two Santa hopefuls reportedly quit the course because of the hullabaloo of the ho, ho, ho.

One would-be Santa has told The Daily Telegraph he was taught not to use "ho, ho, ho" because it was too close to the American slang for prostitute. He also quit. 
"Gimme a break," Julie Gale, who runs the campaign against sexualising children called Kids Free 2B Kids, said.
"We are talking about little kids who do not understand that "ho, ho, ho" has any other connotation and nor should they.
"Leave Santa alone."
Australian Childhood Foundation chief executive officer Dr Joe Tucci said it was the latest example of political correctness gone mad.
"There is no stronger tradition for children than Santa's ho, ho, ho," Dr Tucci said.
Yesterday department stores David Jones and Myers and the Westfield shopping centre chain moved to reassure children, and their parents, that Santa and his customary greeting was part of Christmas's present as well as Christmas's past.
A David Jones spokeswoman said they had discussed the situation with Westaff and their Santas would not besilenced.
"Senior management have assured us that Santas provided to David Jones have not been censored in any way," the spokeswoman said.

At Myer, where Westaff also train the fat men in red suit, Santa could not stop laughing about the suggestion.
"Myer has not directed our Santas to refrain from using 'ho, ho, ho' and believe the expression is an important Christmas tradition," a spokesman for Myer said.

Westfield's Santas are recruited and trained by RegProm Marketing and they will be "ho, ho, ho-ing" a Westfield spokeswoman said.
"Westfield Santas are known for their friendly and welcoming nature and know how to deliver a real festive 'ho, ho, ho'."
Sydney mother Maybel Lopez said she wanted her daughter Andria, 5, to grow up hearing Santa's "ho, ho, ho" just like she had and she did not realise it had other connotations.
"It's what Santa has been saying his whole life - my whole life. It is just a normal thing really for him to say 'ho, ho, ho'," Ms Lopez said.
Westaff's national Santa co-ordinator Sari Hegarty wrote to stores explaining the company's position.
"Westaff has been a provider of quality caring Santas for over 40 years," Ms Hegarty wrote in an email.
"Part of our advice to our Santas is that they should be mindful of children having their first Santa experience.
"We ask our Santas to try techniques such as lowering their tone of voice and using 'ha, ha, ha' to encourage the children to come forward and meet Santa. We wish you and your family a very merry Christmas."
Westaff national operations manager Greg Jansz said it was "misleading" to say the company had banned Santa's traditional greeting and it was being left up to the discretion of Santa himself.

Posted by enzytebob on Thursday, November 15, 2007 @ 11:10:57 EST (6751 reads)
(comments? | Score: 5)
KMA Tabloids: Butts Charged With Stealing Toilet Paper 
Society
Toilet Paper ThiefJun 11, 6:40 PM (ET)

MARSHALLTOWN, Iowa (AP) - Police blame a woman named Butts for stealing toilet paper from a central Iowa courthouse, and while they're chuckling, the theft charge could put her in prison.

"She's facing potentially three years of incarceration for three rolls of toilet paper," Chief Lon Walker said, stifling a laugh as he talked to KCCI-TV about Suzanne Marie Butts. "See, I can't say it with a straight face."

Workers had noticed the rolls disappearing from the Marshall County Courthouse much faster than usual, Walker said.

Butts, 38, was caught last week after an employee saw her taking three rolls of two-ply tissue from a storage closet, Walker said.

Butts insisted it was the first time she'd pilfered toilet paper, but she declined to answer further questions on her attorney's advice.

The fifth-degree theft charge, a misdemeanor, normally carries a sentence of less than a year in jail. But Butts could face more time if convicted under the state's habitual offender law because she has prior theft convictions.

Walker did not know why Butts was at the courthouse, but said that she did not work there.

Posted by enzytebob on Tuesday, June 12, 2007 @ 23:22:15 EDT (851 reads)
(comments? | Score: 0)
KMA Tabloids: NSA TO LAUNCH NEW CONSUMER PHONE SERVICE 
Government

NSA

May 12, 2006 in The Pavement.com

The National Security Agency announced today plans to unveil a new consumer phone service tentatively titled "SafeCall".  The service, a first for a governmental agency, will include unique features such as CALL MONITORING, CALL RECORDING, and CALL TRACKING.  In addition, consumers will be given the choice to use a pre-recorded statement from President George W. Bush on their voicemail instead of the usual welcome message.

Related:  Left And Right Question NSA Spying Program

Posted by enzytebob on Tuesday, June 12, 2007 @ 22:31:33 EDT (869 reads)
(comments? | Score: 1)
KMA Tabloids: Sleeze Bag of the Month 
Society


NASSAU, BAHAMAS -- DNA tests have confirmed which sleezebag manwhored his way to millions. Larry Birkhead is the father of Anna Nicole Smith's million-dollar lovechild. "I told you so!" the late Playboy Playmate's former boytoy said Tuesday after leaving a court hearing. He remarked: "My baby's going to be coming home pretty soon." One has to wonder what exactly he considers his "baby"

Posted by enzytebob on Wednesday, April 11, 2007 @ 00:48:06 EDT (936 reads)
(comments? | Score: 0)
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