Kiss My Ass Clan




Now son, look here, these redwood-trees they´re over a thousand years old. I´m gonna cut me one of these down and use for a base for my satellite dish.
Al Bundy

  KMA Online

  • New Today: 1
  • New Yesterday: 0
  • : 1
  • : 133
  • Total: 1483
  • Waiting: 27
Online NowOnline Now
Server Date/TimeServer Date/Time
  • Aug 03, 2015
  • 09:05 am EDT


  KMA Traffic

Recent Hits:
  • Today: 7,303
  • Yesterday: 11,051
  • Trend:  

Yearly Hits:
  • 2006: 34,640
  • 2007: 1,233,163
  • 2008: 1,875,527
  • 2009: 2,138,492
  • 2010: 2,255,050
  • 2011: 2,348,598
  • 2012: 2,322,712
  • 2013: 2,614,892
  • 2014: 3,013,334
  • 2015: 2,686,568
  • Total: 20,522,981

Average Hits:
  • Hourly:494
  • Daily: 11,854
  • Monthly: 360,550
  • Yearly: 4,326,554

Old KMA Site (2005-06)

  KMA | The Kiss My Ass Clan

What is KMA?
KMA is a multiplayer gaming clan and community. Members from around the world wage battle in a variety of games, and chat via Teamspeak. To learn more about the origins of KMA ( CLICK HERE )

Where is KMA?
 The majority of KMA members are located in the United States and Great Britain. However, KMA also has many members from around the globe including but not limited to: Australia, Canada, Columbia, Netherlands, Poland, Sweden, Singapore and more....

Who is KMA?
KMA members are mature gamers with a sense of humor, that gather in a relaxed, fun, & absurd atmosphere. Most, if not all members speak english, but a variety of different languages are in use. Most of our members are mid 20's to late 30's, but also include several mature younger players.
All user information is kept private
Who runs KMA?
KMA is a member run and funded organization. Each game has it's own division here at KMA, and is run independently with it's own founder and leaders. For more info on our command structure, ( click here ) KMA membership is free, but donations are always greatly appreciated
Since we are global there is likely someone on at any time day or night! KMA is a member funded non-profit organization and will never have spyware, spam, & other common annoyances.
Join KMA?
1. Get Teamspeak and a Mic/Headset
2. Register for our site and contact us for Teamspeak info
3. Get to know us
4. Find the forum for the game you play and post in the recruiting section.
(if it is locked we are not currently recruiting)
Make sure to tell us Your Age, Your Location, & Spoken Language(s)
Other requirements, and the approval process may vary, depending on division....


New York, NY - Current Conditions
Full Forecast
Temperature: Sunny°F      Wind Direction:      Visibility: mi
Feels Like: 32°F      Wind Speed: N/A      Press: steadyin <bar>
Dew Point: °F      Wind Gust: 240      UV: <t>Low</t> - </uv>
          Humidity: 10.0          
Weather feed © The Weather Channel®

  Internet: U.S. Tries to Make it Easier to Wiretap the Internet

Posted by enzytebob on Friday, October 15, 2010 @ 18:19:30 EDT (34563 reads)
By CHARLIE SAVAGE - WASHINGTON — Federal law enforcement and national security officials are preparing to seek sweeping new regulations for the Internet, arguing that their ability to wiretap criminal and terrorism suspects is “going dark” as people increasingly communicate online instead of by telephone.

Essentially, officials want Congress to require all services that enable communications — including encrypted e-mail transmitters like BlackBerry, social networking Web sites like Facebook and software that allows direct “peer to peer” messaging like Skype to be technically capable of complying if served with a wiretap order. The mandate would include being able to intercept and unscramble encrypted messages.

(Read More... | 7685 bytes more | 8 comments | Internet | Score: 0)

  Gaming: StarCraft 2: Wings of Liberty Patch 1.1.2

Posted by enzytebob on Friday, October 15, 2010 @ 17:40:00 EDT (34844 reads)
StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty patch 1.1.2 is now live! This patch features adjustments to protoss, terran, and zerg balance and several bug fixes. Be sure to check out the full patch notes below to learn all about the latest changes.

(Read More... | 3882 bytes more | 14 comments | Gaming | Score: 0)

  Gaming: Pick up your copy of R.U.S.E.

Posted by enzytebob on Friday, October 15, 2010 @ 17:27:22 EDT (33934 reads)
The day we have all been waiting for is finally here! R.U.S.E. is now available! You can pick up your copy of R.U.S.E. today on PC, Xbox 360, or PS3. If you still haven't had the chance to try this game out, don't worry the demo is also available for download on Steam!

(Read More... | 887 bytes more | 5 comments | Gaming | Score: 0)

  Gaming: New Axis and Allies Section

Posted by enzytebob on Friday, January 16, 2009 @ 20:03:33 EST (10441 reads)
Axis and Allies RTS

Well our old A&A section had grown old and tired so it has been replaced by a brand-spankin' new A&A Section
KMA Axis and Allies RTS Main Page
 Axis and Allies
Check out the dynamic slideshows on "Tips to Help avoid Pausing the Game" and "KMA Random Quotes" with the use of the

KMA Axis and Allies RTS Screenshots
 Axis and Allies
Check out the dynamic slideshow of 32 high-quality screenshots

KMA Axis and Allies RTS Recruiting
 Axis and Allies
Cleaned up and simplified recruiting and Clan Rules

KMA Axis and Allies RTS Leaders
 Axis and Allies
Custom-coded A&A Leaders page that shows dynamic info on clan leaders, such as last visit, reg date, recent posts, etc.

KMA Axis and Allies RTS "Quest for Gold" 2v2 Tournament
 Axis and Allies
View Results and Download films from our "The Quest for Gold" 2v2 Tournament of March 29th, 2008
(javascript enabled browser required for some features)

KMA Axis and Allies RTS "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" 1v1 Tournament
 Axis and Allies
View Results and Download films from our "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly" 1v1 Tournament of October 14th, 2005
(javascript enabled browser required for some features)

(Read More... | 224 comments | Gaming | Score: 5)

  Gaming: OwN 1v1 Tournament January 25th, 8:00 P.M.

Posted by enzytebob on Wednesday, January 14, 2009 @ 21:42:53 EST (5808 reads)

LaMo_CaRwAsH wrote:
Date of tourney: January 25th, 8:00 P.M. east coast USA time (5:00 P.M. west coast USA time)

Last day to sign up for Tourney: January 20th

map: 384x384, Germany, all sliders in middle except for water which will be all the way to the left. default starting money and experience.

some rules: NO MORALE HACK, if u use the morale hack u will be kicked from the tourney. If you crash then the opponent gets the win unless it's blatantly obvious that it was unintentional (ex: before any action starts or when ur winning), in which case there will be a rematch. If u crash again the win goes to the opponent regardless of the situation. Save the films of your games in case there is a dispute over who won. Report your wins/losses to me/super. We might be in a game so just chillax for a bit until we come out. It will be a matching gens tourney, the gens will be posted after the 20th along with the bracket.

Depending on the number of players that sign up the tourney may or may not be a double elimination tourney.

Well this is all the stuff i could think of. post questions cuz i half-assed this pretty badly and i know i left something out.

(Read More... | 5 comments | Gaming | Score: 0)

Page 1 of 12 (57 total stories) [ 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | > | >> ]  

  KMA Forums

Top Posters:

 Posts: 3384 
 Posts: 3336 
 Posts: 2680 
 Posts: 2379 
 Posts: 2289 

Jump To FunctionJump To Forum

[Forum] Topic Replies  Author  Views  Last Post 
Click on the Show/Hide text (on the far right) to expand/collapse this block
0  chason  29  2015-08-03 02:42:43  
0  pingsister  30  2015-08-03 02:10:56  
0  pingsister  28  2015-08-03 02:09:01  


Make donations with PayPal!
Donat-o-Meter Stats

August´s Goal: $25.00
Due Date: Aug 31
Amount in: $0.00
Balance: $0.00
Left to go: $25.00


  Feed Previews


Top 100 Clans :: Think your clan is the best? Prove it.

The Central Outpost - The Headquarters for Gaming Clans

Kiss My Ass Clan is officially recognized by the Central Outpost as a genuine gaming organization.


Axis and Allies - Favorite Color?



Votes: 644
Comments: 13




You have been warned!
We have caught 436 shameful hackers.